Stuck!

Sometimes I feel like we are all stuck. Stuck in a place that never sees change. We all want to change, we all want to have something new and better, but we get stuck. Three situations come to mind...

First, when we are in high school and college we have this idea of what our lives will look like when we are twenty something (I don't think we ever look to our thirties because that is just "not going to happen" in our minds). We idealize what we want to have happen in our lives. We want to have a career that we've worked towards. We want to get married and have a family, we want to have a house and decorate and take care of it. We want to go on trips and travel the world. We want to have a good time in everything that we do - most of us want some sort of adventure. Then... we get stuck. We think of all these things and somewhat work towards them, but do we REALLY try as hard as we can to obtain them? Do we really go on trips? Do we have the perfect little family WHEN we want? Do we pick the career that will excite us, or by the end of college do we pick the one that we started with or feel comfortable with? I think the key is to look at each day/week/month/year and think, "Am I doing what I love and dreamed of?" In my humble opinion, if you have accomplished half of what you dreamed, then you are doing pretty good. And if you have only accomplished half, then let God lead you to the rest - life's not over yet!

We also get stuck in "glass cage of emotions!" Meaning, we feel what we feel and its hard for us to shake. Over the years, I have learned that I am a competitive person. It is strange and it sounds terrible, but I don't always want things for the right reason. I want to be the first, the best and sometimes the only one that is going through something. For instance, in teaching, if I hear a student say that they LOVE another teacher that teaches the same thing as me, then I get competitive and try to make my classroom the best. With friendships we want to have a group of friends that are fun and have a good time, and when we don't have that, we try for better. We leave the group we were with and try to make new friends that show off that we are fun and have a good time. But the truth is, the competitiveness that I feel - its jealousy. Its coveting. Its changing who we are to fit something or someone else. When this happens, feelings get sacrificed. People get hurt. Most times it is not intentional, but it happens. So my advice - check to see if your image is that of Christ's and then love who he made you to be. If that means you are competitive, then use it to become the best person God designed you to be. Use it be the best at loving everyone. Use it to be the best at forgiving and forgetting so that you can enjoy every moment.

Finally, I think we get stuck as to what to do next. Do we move forward and let go? Do we take a nap instead of doing paperwork? Do we purchase that item or should we continue to save? Do we change what our life path is to be something radically different? The crazy thing is that there is not a single answer that fits. The key is prayer. If you pray about things and then feel like that is still the way to go - then go. If you pray about it and something is still not right, then wait. If you know that you are a lazy procrastinator, then do paperwork despite the desire to avoid it. Be in prayer so that you feel like you know what your life is and where it is going, and what you are doing is in check. With that, what could go wrong?

The intent of this blog originally started out as a frustration with another person in how they act. But through writing this, I am realizing that what I have - in Christ - my life, my family, my husband, my job, my emotions, my happiness, are what I have. Not what this other person has. I know that my life in Christ is going down the right path. That is all I need. I am not stuck. I am free in the Spirit and where it leads me. So get unstuck today! I don't think anyone reads this, but just try it! Get unstuck in something you feel is holding you back.

There is my fifteen cents worth (it was a little more than just two!)... Happy New Year!

Merry Christmas!

It has been SO long, but I wanted to wish everyone a VERY Merry Christmas!

Living on the Edge!

Oh Steven Tyler... I sometimes wonder why artists write the things they do. What made Aerosmith write a song about there being something wrong with the world today, and therefore we are living on the edge. This is what my song about "living on the edge" would be about:

School is about to start. I have to return next Monday. My summer is staring me right in the face - what did you accomplish? Well, thanks to my mom, I can say that I got some craft projects done!! I also did some work for school (granted it was within the last three days). My edge is that there is three days of summer left, and what will I do with the time? Will I be ready for school and students? Will I be the most tired I've been in a long time? (In the best Steven Tyler scream I can muster...) Living on the edge!

Tomorrow is our triathlon. My first triathlon ever, and I'm feeling nerves that I thought would at least hold out until tonight when I won't be able to sleep. I think I'm just excited to see if all my hard work this summer will pay off and help me to finish in less than 2 hours. When I train for things like this, I try to set a goal so that I can have a focus and keep up the work. However, now that it is less than 24 hours away (hence the edge), I am afraid that I will fall short. Will I make it? Living on the edge!

We are going to have a house in a week, and I need to start packing. I am so excited to have our own place! God really has blessed us this year with our jobs and our situation. I almost feel like we don't deserve to have our own place! We are just two young kids trying to be adults... what is that? Packing also makes the reality sink in a little more - we are going to be homeowners and we better get moving, literally! Living on the edge!

Those three items put me on the edge - the edge of my comfort zone. What defines the edge? Why do I feel anxious about these wonderful things? God tells us, "Do not be anxious about ANYTHING, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the PEACE of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6

This is what I will do - no more living on the edge!

Its one of those things...

Summer always passes by too fast! Its one of those things. First you're excited to get all of those things done that you thought of in the spring. Craft projects, cleaning, exercising, etc. And then, all of a sudden its the middle of August and you're fretting about getting anything done with the time you have left!

I am so blessed to have summer vacation and I wouldn't trade it for anything. However, I have to admit that I like the structure of the school year because for some reason, I actually get things done. I wake up early to exercise. I plan time during the evenings and weekends to do get all the cleaning done. I set aside Saturdays to do craft projects. Oh well. I'm rested and ready to become anxious every night about school again.

On a side note, we are buying a house. Its one of those things too that people would like to do and feel like its the next step. Well, it is our next step in the line of life. God really opened the door to a house in Reedsburg and we are excited to fix it up! Key words are fix it up. It needs a lot of work, but we are excited to tackle it. I don't like to watch HGTV for nothing!

Impossible!

Impossible! For a plain yellow pumpkin to become a golden carriage, Impossible! Cinderella was thinking the same thing as I am - why do things seem so impossible sometimes? Finding a job you love, getting a house, finding friends that are cool... I could go on. Sometimes it seems the only way to have something happen is to make that leap of fatih and try something. Its scary, but it then becomes... Possible.

School is out, time is plentiful and summer vacation is amazing. Hope you all make your impossibles, ...possibles!

Go ahead and ruin it!

Students were working today, things were going smoothly, and what happens eighth hour? A student tries to rearrange an equation to make it more simple, but has a mistake. So i kindly say, "Good thought, however, it is not possible to rearrange it this way because..." and then I go on about why it is not possible. So I show them and then they say "WELL... in physics we did this and we learned how to do this, and we know all this, and blah... blah... blah..." So i say, "I understand that idea and in physics if you can simplify that way, great. However, you can't do it this way because..." and then I go into another reason about why you can't. They just look at each other with smug grins and wait until I am finished. The bell rings and they pack up and say as I'm walking away, "Okay, whatever, I wasn't even listening so I didn't get any of that."

Okay? Whatever? Yeah, you're right, your knowledge of math and the two years that you have actually studied it are more knowledgable than my degree and my abilities. Yeah, you're right that I'm wasting my time helping you when I could have been helping other students that actually want to listen and do care. Yeah, you're right you're getting a C- because you don't hand in the homework. Yeah, you're right your attitude is the worst I've seen in one human being. So go ahead, ruin my day with your smug grins and lazy attitude.

God has blessed me with the knowledge of math and the patience to persist in times of difficulty. So try to ruin my day - because you can't.